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The Diary of Onnotarru
The following is the writings kept in Onnotarru's personal diary. Some of the recounted events are writen long after the fact. Though she doesn't let people read it I'll write the texts here. First entry My earliest memory is of living on the streets of some city. Not in Iceberg, it was warm. I ate food others discarded, living off the trash in an alley. My legs were different then, and there was two of me. Even then humans hated and feared me. Called me monster, vermin. Even as children we knew if we killed a human, the others would not rest until we were dead. If I got separated from my other self I could feel the direction and distance between us. If the humans came after us we could run and find one another later. We were strong and fast, so we could outrun or knock out any human. That was until we met a human unlike any other. I later learned he was a wizard, but then we called him "The Scary Man". He hunted us, and we did all we could to keep away. He did something to us. There was a flash and I could not feel my other. I managed to escape, but I could not locate my other. Later I could feel my other again, it was far away. Outside the city. I had only one thing on my mind. I must find my other, I must be whole again. Second entry I walked for a long time, humans that saw me all reacted. I did not cover myself the way I do now. Though if I did they would no I'm not human by my legs. I ran as fast as I could, only stopping to eat or sleep. I ran for what seemed like forever, but I eventually reached the end of the human's domain as I knew it. I ran more then just outside the city, but outside that civilisation entirely. I found myself in a land with no buildings or trees. Only the sun and the dust and the wind. Strange trees appeared here and there, and my only source of food were lizards and scorpions. In the day the sun was like fire, in the night the moon was as ice. Caves became sanctuaries, small miracles. Running became to hard, walking was the best I could do. The sun burned my skin. Another forever of eating whenever I found something to eat and sleeping whenever I found a cave. After a time I saw in the distance structures. Made from the dust, molded to be solid as the stone I once knew. It was a bit outside my path but it was a haven. Humans or not I would rest in this village of dust. Third entry When I got to the village of dust I met an odd group of humans. Covered in wrappings with cloth over them. I barely made it into the town when I collapsed. I awoke in a bed, uninjured beside the burns from the sun, dust, and wind. These humans nursed me back to health, gave me food, gave me water. They did not care that I was not human. I wanted to cry, but had no tears. They did not care what I was. They spoke in a way I did understand. When I tried to talk I had no voice. I could not speak. I tried and tried and no sound came from my mouth. Eventually a sound came from me, but it was not my own. It was the sound of words spoken by another. I could mimic distorted versions of the words of others, and this was the only way I could camunacate. The eldest of the village stepped forth and talked in the words I was use to, her words thick with the sounds from her own words. She told me to call her Gran, and she taught me how to write and to speak using hands. Gran had the other humans make me wrappings and clothes, told me it would protect me from the sun. For a while I forgot my mission. I lived with Gran and the people of the dust. Oh, Gran told me it's called sand, it not dust. Close enough though. Fouth entry Gran taught me how to make outfits like they did. Although they covered a lot my legs still gave me away. Fourteen sun's and fourteen moons passed. On the fifteenth sun humans from another village in the sand came to trade. When they saw me they sought to destroy me, to destroy Gran. One of them was a wizard like the scary man, she used fire like that of the sun. Something inside me flipped. I must protect them, I must protect Gran. That was my new mission. For the first time in my life I sought out the fight. I noticed the fire woman spoke words when she used her magic. I thought if I mimicked them I could use it to. I felt a burning in me, I focused on that. "Pillar of the desert flame!" I mimicked, the voice distorted. The flames came out wrong, but hurt just the same. My anger came out in the form if fire I used to send the bad sand men away. I got distracted, lost track of the fire woman and was just outside the town. She grabbed Gran, desperation of being the only one of her people left. "I'd rather die then let a monster like you live among us. I will not suffer demons to live. Forbidden spell of the desert flame, self destruct." After hee words a great flame came from her body. All the magic in her body used to turn the town into a crater of glass. I was all that was left. I wanted to cry, but I had no tears. I knew I had to hide my self better, to pass as human my legs must look as the humans do. I focused on my legs, the shape. I felt a burning and heard popping and cracking. I felt a pain and burning unlike any other. When the pain passed my legs had the shape of a human's. Though my feet still did not match I could hide them well enough. I could now pass as human as long as I was under wraps. I once again walked to the pull from far away. I once again walked to my other. Fifth entry Another forever passed. Thanks to Gran I knew how to get food better and how to get water from the odd trees called "cactus". I moved much faster then before, but it was still a forever before I reached the end of the sand and saw trees once more. I never thought I'd be happy to see buildings and people. They knew I came from far away, but to them I was human. I was safe and could rest as much as I liked. I took a long time to rest and recover. The buildings looked different then I was use to. I moved on once more. I encountered a wizard who used keys to call forth entities called celestial spirits. He saw me as just a child. But one time he saw me eatting, saw my face. He did not care. We had an exchange. He showed me his magics, the keys and some angels. And I showed him mine. His angels were beautiful, his summons elegant. Mine.... Not so much. He was heading the way I came from. I told him my mission when he asked and he told me his. He was going home. Home... I had none. It was time to move on. Another forever was expected. Sixth entry Running was possible again, I found with time I could use my own voice but it was hard to do and it hurt to use. It came out harsh but could be used. After a time I came to Iceberg, the land of ice. I was getting closer now. My other self was here in this land of ice. I could feel it. How long had I been moving, I did not know. My body had not changed and was still that of a child. I must have still been young. It was at this time in Iceberg I met him, the one unlike any other. A fellow child by the name of Kennith Frost. I don't know what it was about him. He was important somehow. Would he aid me in my mission, had he seen my other? Like the water to the moon or the moth to the flame I felt a pull to him. He was looking for someone too. His... Mother? A dragon? I was not sure. Words I did not know. We spent some time together. Just the two of us. For a time I forgot again. Forgot my mission. It was different then with Gran, I could still feel the pull then. I could not feel it now. I was able to use his magic too. He tried eating my ice but said it tasted off. It was nice to let go, we had no home but that was okay. I used my real voice for him, he seemed taken aback at first. "You're a girl?" He asked. I remember Gran using that word. Male, female. I understood, but barely. I found these words odd. I explained I was half of a whole, like my Gemini. One becomes two becomes one again. I remembered my mission if but for a moment, but that memory faded once more. I'd spend some time with him, he would teach me new words and I would understand humans better. They are not all bad, but there did seem to be a lot of the bad ones. Seventh entry A night came and I went to sleep, the day came and Kenneth was gone. I tried to follow him, but I reached a point where it was like he vanished. Someone took him from me, like they took my other. He was strong though, he'd find his way out. Maybe I'll see him again. But again I travel. I could not feel him like I could feel my other, back to my mission I go. I came across an abandoned town, Yukimura. Under the buildings some bad men hid. They must have had my other, he was close now. Many a bad wizard I knocked out. I found an odd orb filled with magic energy. The energy of my other. A bad wizard who seemed to lead the rest spoke to me. "Returned to get what we took after all this time? Wait... Your legs are different... There's more then one?! Capture it!" And I responded with my real voice out of anger "where is my other!" He seemed shocked at my voice. He said something about me being female and the other, my other being male. I did not fully understand. But I fought him and broke the orb. The magic went back to my other. I could feel the real him now. He was back the way I came, far away. I wanted to cry, but had no tears. He could likely feel me too. I was not ready to go that far. Adult humans seemed stronger then kids, maybe I would work the same. It was time for me to wait, wait and become stronger. Strong enough to go back. Maybe I'll find Kennith before then. Time to wait for another forever, and more after that. Someday I'll be whole again. Someday. Eighth entry Time passed, a small forever after my encounter with what I now know is a dark guild, I encountered an old man training a young boy. His magic was beautiful and he was teaching to this kid. The kid looked kinda like Kennith but blond. It was not exact but time passed. I got excited and almost jumped out but then the old man called his name. Logan. Logan Hykin. I spent some time watching them. The old man was blind I think. He spotted me, called me out. I trained with them for a bit. I learned the glass magic like any other. It came out changed. I expected something horrid. But it was beautiful. My magic made it more beautiful. I wanted to cry, but had no tears. I noticed a birthmark on Logan. It reminded me of Kennith. I asked if he had family, he said the old man adopted him and he did not know. I was a good training partner for Logan but I had to move on. I told him he should ask around about his birth mark, maybe he'd find his family. Was Kennith his family, his brother? Who knows. I left on good terms. Ninth entry Forever after forever, time passed and my body grew. I had to remake my clothes a few times. I eventually stoped growing. I was an adult, I think. My other was still in the same detection, still just as far. He's not heading to me. Is he waiting to? Getting stronger like me. I met a girl. Not human, like me but also not. An Inhuman she said she was. Made by magic and science. Darnella Kimble was her name. She and I got along. Two non humans treated like monsters. I was around her magic a while. I could probably use it but have not. What would my magic do to it? I'd rather not find out. We had to separate and go different ways. I was looking for someone and she had her own path. I wished her the best... I wish her the best. I hope she's okay. I wonder how everyone I've met over the years is doing. That old man is likely gone by now, the summoner is likely old. Kennith and Logan are likely grown too. Tenth entry I'm running out of room in the book. Got to stop doodling on the pages. I'll need to start another soon. I want so bad to be whole again, but I also worry. I've been separated for so long. I've changed, has my other changed as well? I also would like to see Kennith again. Maybe get his help. I should meet new people. I've decided to travel once more but not in the direction of my other. I think I'll explore Iceberg. My other is alive and could likely come to me as well if he wants. He's not in danger, I know that much. I've got some time. I'll use it to grow, not physically, but mentally and emotionally. Also magicly. The next time I write, it'll be in a new book. Maybe I'll get a bigger one this time. Till I write again, I am still one half looking to be whole. I am, Onnotarru.